Faux Passion

The result of a lot of conversations lately have been making me think more about passion. Not like sexual passion, but having a love for an idea, one worth committing to.

Part of this has come from me discovering how wonderful it is to be surrounded by people who truly care about what they are doing to shape the world...be it (for me) environmentalism, political, cycling. There is a wonderful feeling being with these people celebrating their passion. And it makes me want to get more involved in those communities whenever they are celebrating their love.

Now this is where it gets a little scattered. (As if it hasn't been already.)


This is where I get to think on all those people who are lacking.

I ended a nearly seven year relationship partly because I realized that the person who I thought was going to help push me be more revolutionary wasn't that at all. He was anti corporate media, & was so against shopping at Wal*Mart that he would only go wearing something offensive. He was going to be a poet, & wanted his MFA to be focused on gender lit.
Where is he now? He works for a bank processing applications. I never bothered to invite him to political events (reproductive rights, environmentalism, etc.) because I was sure he wasn't interested in going, even if it was just to support me.
His idealism was weak. The words seem like they fell short, & ended up being just words instead of thoughts or actions. And that's no good for a person who wants to love more.

But what's more insidious is finding a person who is doing all the actions, & then discovering how expansive the lack of ideals is.

I met this person who seemed like he could be pretty good. He was vegetarian & was very good about having all his products be earth-friendly. Turns out that both of those are just because he worries about what he puts into himself, & not a concern for anything in the broader world. He told me recently about how he felt really conflicted because he wanted to see Tom Morello perform this weekend (because he's pretty awesome), but didn't like that the concert was a benefit for Cindy Sheehan's congressional run. The reason: "I don't like her politics." I know that she's against the Iraq War, what else is there? What is there to be offended by?
Especially with the first part, it just disgusts me to know that someone is going through the actions for selfish reasons & not for some altruistic purpose. Sure, it's better than not doing those things, but it still shows a person that I wouldn't want to hang out with.